File this one under, the weirdest fucking story you will read today. A woman named Jennifer Mulburn, an avid Auburn football fan is dating Brad Lesson who is a huge Georgia football fan. Surely, this relationship wouldn’t work given the rivalry in the SEC and so on and so forth. Here is where the story takes an interesting (weird) turn.
They are in an adult breastfeeding relationship, of course commonly known as ABR. What The Fuck! Jennifer came to find out all about this while doing research, found a forum in which people actually talk about and try to find connections through their adult breastfeeding. Lets take a quick pause for a second to try and gather our thoughts here. First, there is an actual forum for this thing, that absolutely boggles my mind. Secondly, it goes into depth how adult breastfeeding can form a bond like no other. That made Jennifer envious and she was on the search to find her breast mate to join on the fun.
That is where our friend Brad comes into the picture, an old boyfriend of Jennifer’s from school. Brad likes boobs, especially the bigger ones, apparently much more then he likes his Georgia Bulldogs. She proposed the idea to him and it become love at first tit. I can go on for days with this, but I will pass up more jokes till the end. Jennifer and Brad must “dry feed’ for every two hours in an attempt to confuse the body into thinking it is for a child so she can start producing milk. Obviously the time consumption forced Jennifer to take time off from her job as a bartender, but clearly shes got the good stuff all on her own.
I can’t say I am not a little envious of the guy, he literally gets to suck on some boobies every two hours of the day. Most guys would be asking, sign me up for that job, until they come to the realization that these boobs come with a special circumstance. As a society, I think we can all agree that boobs are pretty fucking awesome, but we have to draw the line somewhere.
h/t Busted Coverage